Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Eight Steps Toward a More Satisfying Life Want to lift your level of happiness? Here are some practical suggestions from University of California psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky, based on research findings by her and others. Satisfaction (at least a temporary boost) guaranteed 1. Count your blessings. One way to do this is with a “gratitude journal” in which you write down three to five things for which you are currently thankful—from the mundane (your peonies are in bloom) to the magnificent (a child’s first steps). Do this once a week, say, on Sunday night. Keep it fresh by varying your entries as much as possible. 2. Practice acts of kindness. These should be both random (let that harried mom go ahead of you in the checkout line) and systematic (bring Sunday supper to an elderly neighbor). Being kind to others, whether friends or strangers, triggers a cascade of positive effects—it makes you feel generous and capable, gives you a greater sense of connection with others and wins you smiles, approval and reciprocated kindness—all happiness boosters. 3. Savor life’s joys. Pay close attention to momentary pleasures and wonders. Focus on the sweetness of a ripe strawberry or the warmth of the sun when you step out from the shade. Some psychologists suggest taking “mental photographs” of pleasurable moments to review in less happy times. 4. Thank a mentor. If there’s someone whom you owe a debt of gratitude for guiding you at one of life’s crossroads, don’t wait to express your appreciation—in detail and, if possible, in person. 5. Learn to forgive. Let go of anger and resentment by writing a letter of forgiveness to a person who has hurt or wronged you. Inability to forgive is associated with persistent rumination or dwelling on revenge, while forgiving allows you to move on. 6. Invest time and energy in friends and family. Where you live, how much money you make, your job title and even your health have surprisingly small effects on your satisfaction with life. The biggest factor appears to be strong personal relationships. 7. Take care of your body. Getting plenty of sleep, exercising, stretching, smiling and laughing can all enhance your mood in the short term. Practiced regularly, they can help make your daily life more satisfying. 8. Develop strategies for coping with stress and hardships. There is no avoiding hard times. Religious faith has been shown to help people cope, but so do the secular beliefs enshrined in axioms like “This too shall pass” and “That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.” The trick is that you have to believe them. http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/images/TimeMagazine/Time-Happiness.pdf

Friday, January 13, 2012

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT. “A meaningful life is one that joins with something larger than we are – and the larger that something is, the more meaning our lives have” – Professor Martin Seligman, University of Pennsylvania. WHAT'S YOUR LIFE JOINED TO?

Thursday, January 12, 2012

I highly recommend the books by Martin E.P. Seligman; as an example here is an excerpt of his latest book. What is Well-Being? Martin E.P. Seligman, April 2011 This an excerpt from Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-Being The Original Theory: Authentic Happiness Positive psychology, as I intend it, is about what we choose for its own sake. I chose to have a back rub in the Minneapolis airport recently because it made me feel good. I chose the back rub for its own sake, not because it gave my life more meaning or for any other reason. We often choose what makes us feel good, but it is very important to realize that often our choices are not made for the sake of how we will feel. I chose to listen to my six-year-old’s excruciating piano recital last night, not because it made me feel good but because it is my parental duty and part of what gives my life meaning. The theory in Authentic Happiness is that happiness could be analyzed into three different elements that we choose for their own sakes: positive emotion, engagement, and meaning. And each of these elements is better defined and more measurable than happiness. The first is positive emotion; what we feel: pleasure, rapture, ecstasy, warmth, comfort, and the like. An entire life led successfully around this element, I call the “pleasant life.” The second element, engagement, is about flow: being one with the music, time stopping, and the loss of self-consciousness during an absorbing activity. I refer to a life lived with these aims as the “engaged life.” Engagement is different, even opposite, from positive emotion; for if you ask people who are in flow what they are thinking and feeling, they usually say, “nothing.” In flow we merge with the object. I believe that the concentrated attention that flow requires uses up all the cognitive and emotional resources that make up thought and feeling. There are no shortcuts to flow. On the contrary, you need to deploy your highest strengths and talents to meet the world in flow. There are effortless shortcuts to feeling positive emotion, which is another difference between engagement and positive emotion. You can masturbate, go shopping, take drugs, or watch television. Hence, the importance of identifying your highest strengths and learning to use them more often in order to go into flow. There is yet a third element of happiness, which is meaning. I go into flow playing bridge, but after a long tournament, when I look in the mirror, I worry that I am fidgeting until I die. The pursuit of engagement and the pursuit of pleasure are often solitary, solipsistic endeavors. Human beings, ineluctably, want meaning and purpose in life. The Meaningful Life consists in belonging to and serving something that you believe is bigger than the self, and humanity creates all the positive institutions to allow this: religion, political party, being Green, the Boy Scouts, or the family. http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/newsletter.aspx?id=1533

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

10 Ways to Become More Grateful By Robert A. Emmons | November 17, 2010 | 4 comments Robert Emmons 1. Keep a Gratitude Journal. 2. Remember the Bad. 3. Ask Yourself Three Questions. “What have I received from __?”, “What have I given to __?”, and “What troubles and difficulty have I caused?” 4. Learn Prayers of Gratitude. 5. Come to Your Senses. 6. Use Visual Reminders. 7. Make a Vow to Practice Gratitude. 8. Watch your Language. 9. Go Through the Motions. 10. Think Outside the Box. http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/ten_ways_to_become_more_grateful1/
Following our goal, I found the following web page on which we can learn about the excellent results of feeling gratitude; not only in our souls, but also in our bodies. http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/expandinggratitude/ Check it out and let's start feeling gratitude.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Our purpose in this New Year is to learn how to be happy. For this purpose I propose the Positive Psychology Theory. The following is the iformation on the web page: Positive Psychology is the scientific study of the strengths and virtues that enable individuals and communities to thrive. The Positive Psychology Center promotes research, training, education, and the dissemination of Positive Psychology. This field is founded on the belief that people want to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives, to cultivate what is best within themselves, and to enhance their experiences of love, work, and play. Positive Psychology has three central concerns: positive emotions, positive individual traits, and positive institutions. Understanding positive emotions entails the study of contentment with the past, happiness in the present, and hope for the future. Understanding positive individual traits consists of the study of the strengths and virtues, such as the capacity for love and work, courage, compassion, resilience, creativity, curiosity, integrity, self-knowledge, moderation, self-control, and wisdom. Understanding positive institutions entails the study of the strengths that foster better communities, such as justice, responsibility, civility, parenting, nurturance, work ethic, leadership, teamwork, purpose, and tolerance. Some of the goals of Positive Psychology are to build a science that supports: Families and schools that allow children to flourish Workplaces that foster satisfaction and high productivity Communities that encourage civic engagement Therapists who identify and nurture their patients' strengths The teaching of Positive Psychology Dissemination of Positive Psychology interventions in organizations & communities The link is : http://www.ppc.sas.upenn.edu/ Here you can find wonderful information that will help you achieve happiness.